mydearbuttbuddy

June 22, 2020 my dear butt buddy, We haven't really  spoken in over a month and it feels so wrong. Every week or so I get a couple lines from you without any investment. I keep trying but it hurts less now. I told you that I've been seeing a girl and you don't seem to care. Maybe you do care. I want you to care. I want you to ask about her. Literally all of my other friends have asked to see a photo of her but you haven't. She's beautiful. Inside and out. I am going to ask her to be my girlfriend this week and it feels like I can't tell you though I desperately want to. I want you to be happy for me. I know that's a lot to ask when you are so deeply unhappy inside, but I am getting back to feeling like I did something wrong with you. To you. I miss you so so much.

June 1st, 2020 My dear butt buddy, I almost have a girlfriend. I say "almost" but I don't know how close I actually am. She is literally the cutest. She ticks off all my boxes. I feel incredibly lucky to have connected with her, and she lives about 20 mins from me! So close! We talk every day. She is in therapy and doing pretty well. I am so excited. But I don't feel like I can tell you. I have no idea how you'll react, and I feel like I can better gauge and manage it if I tell you when you're talking to me. But you're not talking to me. We haven't talked in two weeks. I have tried but you haven't responded. I hope you're not upset with me, and you're probably not. But I wish I could hear something from you. I miss you.